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But when I read it again it could, like, be a lesbian writing about another lesbian chick going down on her and eating her lunch-box.

There are other chicks that write poetry on 4chan, but some of them suck at it. But that's kinda what 4chan is for: people who suck at things get a chance to put their shit out, too. But it ain't all chicks, there are some poems where I think the poet is a gay dude maybe. Here's one:

I can still smell the burnt toast

from the kitchen

with the Ikea cupboards

that morning after

you brought me to heaven

with your mouth


I don't know, maybe it's a straight dude writing that shit, but it reads gay to me. Because I don't think many straight dudes write poems about blow-jobs, they just like them.

But when I read it again it could, like, be a lesbian writing about another lesbian chick going down on her and eating her lunch-box. Because I bet a lot of lesbian poets write that kinda shit, but I don't read a lot of lesbian poems, so I'm just guessing.

I think in the old days straight dudes would write poems to try to get chicks to fuck them. I'm talking about the 1800s I think, when a straight guy could still be named Percy and people wouldn't call him a fag because of it.

But nowadays, I think straight dudes just write lyrics and play the guitar, hoping that'll get chicks to fuck them. But even that can get fucked up sometimes. I mean, Kurt Cobain wrote songs and became a big star, he could probably fuck any chick, but then he decided he would just fuck Courtney Love, which doesn't make any sense to me.

And then there are the rap dudes, who write rap songs that get women to fuck them. And they even write in their raps songs how they want to fuck them: face-down/ass-up, in the club, shit like that. And it seems like it works for them, but at least their stuff rhymes and shit.

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  1. I got laid after playing an acoustic version of Money For Nothin, no shit. She had a guitar in her apartment and asked me if I played, so I did, after tuning it; it was horrendously out of tune when I picked it up. But mostly I would suggest electrified rock, with a band(Leader of the pack thing) with an intense beat and some searing solos if you want to get laid, because I think my experience there was something of a unicorn, and I was likely going to get laid anyways, and I was lucky it didn’t blow it for me.

    I had been working on an acoustic version of Freebird but I got sort of bored with it. That might have been OK too if I hadn’t forgotten about it because I was bored by it. If you add in the proper 6ths and 9ths to that song in the right places, it sounds good on an acoustic, but like I said, it’s boring to play.

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