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And you can't call him on his shit, because then you look like an asshole being a dick to a homeless dude over some hot dogs and beers.

So now you got a tiny little house in your backyard, and the city hooks you up with a homeless person to live in it. I think they mean well, but a lot of shit can go sideways with this, because a lot of homeless people aren't good at making lifestyle choices.

Like, they're in the back looking at child porn by using your WiFi, and now the FBI is knocking down your door at four in the morning and shit, when it was the dude in the back who was whacking off to twelve-year-old girls who just thought the creepy old molester-guy was going to give them free candy.

Or a crack-whore moves in, but she's off the crack and maybe she even got her teeth fixed some, and now she's kinda hot, and so you got a kinda hot crack-whore who doesn't do crack anymore living behind you, and maybe your wife isn't home a lot, and pretty soon you're the homeless dude because your wife just kicked your ass out the door for fucking the kinda hot crack-whore who doesn't do crack anymore. And had her teeth fixed some.

Or maybe you're having a backyard barbecue with some friends, and the homeless dude joins in, because he's in the backyard, too. And now he's eating all the hot dogs and shit, because they're free and the hot dogs are right there, and you thought you bought enough beer but you suspect he took a couple of twelve-packs when you weren't looking and put them in his tiny little house.

And you can't call him on his shit, because then you look like an asshole being a dick to a homeless dude over some hot dogs and beers, but no one wants to come to your barbecues anymore and you worry if you say anything the homeless dude's gonna call a few of his homeless friends over and now they're gonna fuck your shit up. Or just move in with him, same difference.

So I'm not sure this is gonna work, is what I'm saying, but maybe I'm a pessimist. But if I can picture a crack-whore who doesn't do crack anymore and is kinda hot then I think I'm a bit of an optimist, too.


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