Skip to main content

And I think a lot of celebrities know about the ass-spiders, too. Like, Kim Kardashian has ass-spider fear for sure.

I was on 4chan checking out the chicks spreading their ass cheeks and showing their assholes, when I came back to Althouse to catch up on her shit, because sometimes checking out chicks spreading their ass cheeks and showing their assholes makes me feel kind of depressed after a while, I'm not sure why. So I read about the homeless living in people's backyards, and I read about the Cosby rape shit, and I realize something: celebrities and the homeless are pretty much the same people.

Because when you're crazy and fucked up, and shit doesn't go your way, you're homeless, but when you're crazy and fucked up and have a talent people like, or have great tits, then you're, like, an artist on YouTube or a model on Instagram, and crazy and fucked up just show how much of a true artist you are. So, basically, society let's you be crazy if you're poor enough, or rich enough, but if you're rich enough then they want to watch.

Like, look at celebrities on Twitter: if you took away the emojis and hashtags and shit, what you're reading ain't much different than the homeless dude on the corner ranting aimlessly about injustice and how the voices in his head tell him he should kill you.

The homeless dude shits on the sidewalk and society lets him do it; the celebrity could shit on the sidewalk and people would say he's keeping it real and they would, like, hashtag it #shitsreal and it'd be trending and then all of a sudden even your mom knows who this celebrity is, because she read on AOL that he shit on the sidewalk. And no one is really surprised by either, because that's the kind of shit those people do, you pretty much expect it.

I mean, the homeless dude might be shitting on the street, and the celebrity chick might be bleaching her asshole instead, but I bet the homeless guy would bleach his asshole too, if he could afford it, because -- well -- he's got a homeless guy's asshole, and you know it could use a good bleaching, maybe, but mostly because he thinks it will get rid of the imaginary spiders he believes are living in his asshole, at least for a little while. And I think a lot of celebrities know about the ass-spiders, too. Like, Kim Kardashian has ass-spider fear for sure.

So, basically you have people with more than a bit of the crazy and no impulse control, and the police won't lock them up because they ain't got time for that shit. But if you or I shit on the sidewalk we'd be, like, in court having to explain to a judge why we shit on the sidewalk, and the judge would hold us to a higher standard, because we're not poor enough or rich enough to get away with that kind of crazy and no impulse control.

And that's how a celebrity can drug a chick in a hotel room to have sex with her, and the homeless guy can get a homeless chick methed-out in a tent by the freeway so that she'll suck his cock: same thing, really. But if you're an average guy in college with a drunk chick they'll really jump your shit.

<a href="https://iwantedcheeseonthat.blogspot.com">I post my shit here.</a>

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

I mean, straight men in their seventies don’t dress like a pirate unless they are actually a pirate, okay?

I always thought the song was, like, Mick’s way of letting Keith know gently that, no, Mick was not going to fuck him and shit. Because if you can’t tell that Keith Richards is gay then you just don’t know how to look. I mean, straight men in their seventies don’t dress like a pirate unless they are actually a pirate, okay? So when Mick sings “I saw her today at the reception A glass of wine in her hand I knew she was gonna meet her connection” The ‘her’ is Keith, and Keith and Mick are at, like, some party or shit, and Keith’s looking for his drug dealer, because he’s not going to get to fuck Mick and now he needs some more drugs. Pretty obvious. Then Mick sings “But I went down to the demonstration To get your fair share of abuse Singing, "We're gonna vent our frustration If we don't we're gonna blow a fifty-amp fuse" And the ‘demonstration’ is a metaphor for the recording studio, where Keith is abusive of Mick because Mick isn’t rock-and-roll e...

I mean, most of the time the cattle prods are like a metaphor and shit, but sometimes you need a real cattle prod to make your shit obvious.

"our favorite characters are unrelentingly tortured — electrocuted with cattle prods, kicked, threatened with dogs, chained to a gas stove and burned, left alive on a gallows covered with urine." This does kinda sound like harsh shit, but it's, like, a corollary of Internet Rule 34: if it's on video and involves a chick, some dude somewhere will masturbate to it. It's just how media works, if it can't get chicks outraged and dudes masturbating then it isn't doing the job. But "The Handmaid’s Tale" is, like, for chicks to masturbate their feminist clit. Because a lot of chicks feel the most represented in art when they are a victim, like, getting electrocuted with cattle prods. I mean, most of the time the cattle prods are like a metaphor and shit, but sometimes you need a real cattle prod to make your shit obvious. It's kinda like how chicks get Oscars for portraying hookers: because all chicks are hookers and being electrocuted by catt...

"You no hero, GI, you my Jane Fonda! You my Jane Fonda bitch!"

"Has anyone ever asked McCain if, like, when he was a prisoner of war, did any Viet Cong dude ever fuck him in the ass?" I bet, if it happened, it went something like this: "How you like war now, GI? How you like your war now, Big American Soldier Man?" "Stop fucking me in the ass, Viet Cong Prison Guard dude!" "I fuck you in the ass, GI! You bomb my people, and now I fuck you in the ass with the fury of a thousand napalm!" "I'm a soldier! You fucking me in the ass is, like, against the Geneva Convention and shit." "There is no protection for the Imperialist Mangy Dogs! I fuck you in the ass like mangy dog, Imperialist GI!" "Please stop fucking me in the ass, Viet Cong Prison Guard dude!" "You will not defeat the glorious revolution of the peoples! The revolution will not stop until all the Imperialist Mangy Dogs are fucked in the ass!" "It hurts! Even though your cock is small co...